This is taken from a series of questions posted on Twitter by a notoriously nasty transphobe in December 2014. I called it TERF COGIATI after the COGIATI test. If you’re not familiar with COGIATI, it was a thing that was doing the rounds back when I transitioned, and is basically a piece of pseudoscience pretend psychology that is supposed to “assist” in determining if you are a trans woman. You can take it here if you like, but it’s minutes of your life you’ll never get back.

I think the comparison is apt, as the questions below seem to be motivated by this transphobic individual thinking they have a unique insight into what makes trans women tick. Like COGIATI, it’s a mix of some correlations (lots of trans women do have a STEM background, for example), some gender stereotyping (assuming you want to wear high heels), and some outright bizarre conjecture (is pregnancy like pizza delivery, what?)

Some of the questions are clearly digs at specific people; “subtweets”, if you will.

The test is, of course, entirely spurious. I got 5 “yes” answers of 51 questions when I took it and I’m a long term transitioned trans woman who had SRS years ago. You should be aware that this is probably designed to make you feel bad about yourself if you are a trans woman, and it contains some pretty nasty stuff. I reiterate, these questions are designed to hurt you.

I copied most of them verbatim from Twitter. Two had references to specific people, which I removed (the questions remain, they just don’t reference people any more). A couple more I corrected typos on. Apart from that, it’s a direct copy and paste.

Here’s what the nasty transphobe who came up with this “test” says about how it works:

“Transgender means anything anyone wants it to, but the key is that everyone understand how oppressed heterosexual white male perverts are. Maybe you are a transwoman and don’t know it. Could you be a transwoman? Take the following test. Assign yourself one point for every correct answer. “

I think trans women are supposed to answer “yes” to lots of them, but I answered yes to fewer than 10%. See how you do:

1. Do you enjoy pornography?
2. Do you work as an IT professional?
3. Do you have a profile on FetLife?
4. Is prostitution a rewarding career option?
5. Do women really “have it all”?
6. Are flaming homos and butch dykes kind of gross?
7. Is “privilege” an opt-into opt-out option?
8. Are feminists whiney bitches?
9. Do you celebrate the cultural subordination rituals (“femininity”) that are forced onto females?
10. Do you understand Feminism in a way women never could?
11. Do lesbians offend you by excluding males?
12. Does the thought of being mistaken for a gay man anger you?
13. Are women monsters (or uppity bitches) for having women-only events?
14. Do women have no right to speak on the topic of gender?
15. Do you wish women would be silent in general, and exist only to serve you?
16. Did you steal your sister or mother’s underwear and masturbate while wearing it?
17. Were you always seen as that scary asocial misfit loser guy?
18. Does it anger you when women hold you at a distance socially?
19. Have you always known you were very angry for some reason and it was women’s fault somehow?
20. Can you “do woman” better than most women, who take things for granted?
21. Do you have a successful STEM career?
22. Do you spend a lot of time online?
23. Are you a computer gamer? On World of Warcraft? Second Life? League of Legends? Pokemon?
24. Long time Dungeons and Dragons shaman of undecided loyalty? Or whatever the fuck?
25. Does it make you angry when women and children fear you?
26. Do you want to be pretty?
27. Do you have a tumblr page that exhibits your hobby of having a staple gun applied to yourself because BDSM?
28. Does it “make you” want to kill yourself when women don’t do what you want them to? Or think what you want them to think?
29. Is a penis a big ‘ole sperm ejaculating clitoris?
30. Is the experience of pregnancy akin to waiting for pizza delivery?
31. Does “brain sex” make the women-brained enjoy wearing stilletos?
32. Does “brain sex” make women smile more?
33. Do you get an erection when a store clerk accidentally calls you “Madam”?
34. Are you “gender critical” enough for libfem handmaid approval but decry actual Lesbian Feminists as “extremists”.
35. Do you call yourself a male radical feminist and teach women’s studies?
36. Did you used to post on PUA boards?
37. Do you, or have you ever, partaken of an anime avatar?
38. Have you been in the military?
39. Have you attended a male-only educational facility?
40. Have you been in prison?
41. Do you own more than three firearms?
42. Do you feel you are destined for “greatness” if you could only break “out of your shell”?
43. Are you ready to run for an elected office?
44. Have you considered the windfall of a gender identity related disability claim?
45. Got what it takes to run your own, solo, self-established activist org?
46. Dreaming of making that Lee Press-On Lesbian Porn Lifestyle a reality?
47. Tired of no one noticing what a Special Person you are?
48. Looking for a “do-over”?
49. Do you have a phoenix or butterfly tattoo?
50. Pleasure yourself by wearing “ladies panties” under your uniform at work?
51. Are you an identical twin?